My Friend Lucy

Last year I learned that a close friend from college committed suicide. He battled demons some would say. He may have been "touched" his sister would confide in me during our only conversation.

During a road trip I found myself driving by Anderson, California. Hometown to Don. It was the first time I thought of him on this trip. I made it to the Charles Schultz museum. In the many odes to my beloved childhood characters I found a comic scene between Lucy and Charlie Brown. 
It instantly reminded me of that first year with Don. He was a sophomore. We were the same age because I took a gap year. We would sit for hours and discuss life. He loved drinking dark ales like Guiness. He stopped going to class. He had played football his freshman year but quit his second. I gave him the nickname Lucy because he'd listen to my guy woes (I briefly dated one of his room-mates and it didn't end smoothly. He'd give me his perspective as I'd shrug it off. We both left after that year but remained close friends for several years afterward.

He bounced from job to job. He was a big, shy guy. I never knew him to have problems. He didn't act out. He wasn't agitated or angry. I didn't know what depression looked like, but oddly enough two of my closest friends that year suffered from it.

I mentioned it before, but we drifted apart. I used to make point to call or visit but in the last decade his tone had changed. His Facebook posts were politically angry. He espoused gun-rights and his rants carried a mean tone that led me to believe he wasn't the person I knew.

It is true. People do change. Sometimes they don't change as much as show their true colors. In Don's case, I believe life was not kind to him. He had too much to overcome or which with to deal, and that made him hard. It calcified his persona to protect his tender heart. I couldn't imagine my life without having never met him. I can still hear his baritone voice and vividly recall how he would slowly and carefully pour his Guiness into a glass. Take that first sip and sigh "Ahhh".

I always tell the Dude, life isn't fair. Don is just one example, a small town boy who grew up with dreams that fell apart and died alone. A very real illustration of how unfair life is for many people.

So this past July I left a little piece of my heart in a small town. Or maybe I found it. Thanks for being my friend. This one's for you. Happy Birthday Lucy. Ahhh....

Please consider supporting mental health through healthcare policy by contacting your legislators and telling them we need to provide mental health coverage as part of preventative wellness. Let's educate young adults to recognize the symptoms of depression and advocate colleges to do more awareness among their students, resident advisors and parents. College is a critical time and depression can have life-long and devastating ramification when not addressed promptly.